Recalling That Peculiarly Bovine Feeling

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It was an evening of exhausting questions and youtubing. I must admit, with all the things I have to be grateful to Laura Ingalls Wilder for, I hadn't anticipated this.

Theron: "But Mama, WHERE does the milk come out of Almanzo's cow?"

Mama: "Well a cow has an udder honey, kind of like a Mama's boobies. Look."

~quick google image search for calf drinking~

Theron: "But Mama, HOW does the milk come out of Almanzo's cow?"

Mama: "Well, a baby cow drinks from the udder, kind of like how you suck on your thumb."

~cute vid of calf bonking its poor mama's udders to stimulate milk flow; recollections of empathy with female bovines resurface~

Theron: "But Almanzo doesn't drink from a cow."

Mama: "No honey, he ~milks~ the cow."

~vid of farmer explaining how to milk a cow~

Theron: "Mama! What's he doing to the cow's booby?"

Mama: "He's getting the milk out into the pail, honey."

Theron: WHY is the cow's booby down by its pee-pee?"

Mama: "..."

Theron: "I'm glad your boobies aren't down there."

Mama: "..."

Theron: "Mama, how did I--"

Mama (not feeling up to a demonstration): "Here son, Buffy and Big Bird talk about it real well..."

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